Saturday, July 25, 2009

My Confused Letter


Dear Girl Who Asked Me to Move at the Head Automatica Show Last Night,

First, let me start off by saying this is not going to be an angry letter. You were both polite and patient, and did not pull any lame shit whatsoever. You did confuse me, though. Let me explain.

As the show began, and as it continued, the room was only half full. Most of the people were crammed towards the stage, becoming more and more spread out as it got back to the middle of the room. My friends and I were standing in the middle of the room towards the right a bit. I have included an expert diagram.
I spent the entire show in that one spot, and I danced it up. I danced so hard, that I may have hurt myself! My point in saying so is that I was clearly there. I'm a big guy, I'm jumping up and down, flailing, jerking my body all over the place. You saw me. It was known I was there. No secrets.

After roughly an hour of standing in that spot, I decided to run to the mens room to tinkle. I was in that room for approximately one minute. I would dare to argue that I only left my night-long spot for roughly two minutes, tops! After tinklage, I returned to the exact same spot I had left.

3 minutes later, you came up to me. "Excuse me tall dude, but you just stood right in my line of sight, and now I can't see anything." What the shit?

I responded also kindly, indicating I was merely standing next to my friends. I offered that I would move left and you could move right and it would be a compromise. You accepted this.

But seriously, what the shit. I was in that fucking spot all night. I left for two minutes. I come back, and I'm in your line of sight? THERE WERE PRACTICALLY NO PEOPLE BEHIND ME. YOU COULD EASILY MOVE WITHOUT EVEN A SMALL AMOUNT OF INCONVENIENCE. NO PUSHING OR SHOVING REQUIRED. Did you show up in that two minutes that I went to piss and claim the spot directly behind me? Did you not notice the huge guy jumping around in front of you for an hour? I'm so confused.

Let me point out that you were pretty short. I know it must suck to be short and go to shows, what with all the tall people in your way and blocking your view. In fact, this is one reason why I stand in the middle of crowds. My mission at shows is to have the best time possible without ruining anyone else's time there. I dance around, but only in my spot. I don't stand in the front row so I don't block tons of people's views. And yet, even with these concessions, you still decided that after an hour and ten minutes of show, I had stepped on your line of sight.

What the shit.

Signed,
Not mad just fucking confused Todd.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Frustration! Wonderment! Meat!

Frustration: I HATE GIVING MY PARENTS TECH SUPPORT. OMFG. I WISH THERE WERE MORE ANGRY ACRONYMS I COULD TYPE OUT IN ALL CAPS BECAUSE I'M THAT F'ING PISSED.

Sorry about the caps. Shit drives me nuts! Its a combination of borderline ignorance to all things technological with normal family frustration which is multiplied by the fact that my family's fuckin' nuts! LASDFIAEJLASJDFKASJFKLWILJASKDF. Shenanigans.

Wonderment!
Last night I went on an emergency 1am bike ride. It was great. Cooler air, empty roads and sidewalks to almost kill myself on, and an excuse to say I worked out yesterday. Marvelous.

Also filed under wonderment: human beings. Seriously. We can be amazing sometimes. We can take some of the most extreme physical and mental stress and come out alive on the other end. Good Job, God. You designed a pretty amazing product, and I would like to invest.

My dearest mother sent my roommates and I Omaha steaks to thank us for putting her up while she visited. She's pretty awesome. I am starving and want to devour some steak. However, it must wait till tonight.

I'll see ya next time...

{Reading Rainbow!}

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Too Long! Too long! TOOOO LONG!

Hello. I said I would write again after I had survived the end of the school year. Well…its been a teency few more days than that, but here I am, alive and well. Yes, I just used teency, deal with it.

First, some superficial losses to discuss.

  1. Weight. I’ve shed roughly 20 pounds since I began taking a look at calories and being more active/ running around instead of couching it all day. Its good, though I still have a long way to go. Continuing to eat smart and make good food decisions won’t be a problem for me, but keeping myself active will. DAMN YOU LAZYNESS WHY DO YOU TEMPT ME SO?!

  1. Hair. On the afternoon of June 20, I entered into a hair salon and requested a 3 inch trim. I was scalped, looked like a douche bag with a bowl cut, and thus had to take the rest off. As of today, it has grown out a bit, and I have for the most part adapted to it, though its still weird city!
The newly emoed me.

Now, I have gained some things as well. I’ve gained some new friends, and some new experiences. For instance, last night I played hand drums (and foot tambourine?) at the Shabbat Services held at the 6th and I synagogue in DC. It was a whim that originated through Twitter, created some nervousness, but ended up beautifully! I played with a rabbi from Yale named Lauren. She was extremely kind and immediately likeable. Her baby girl Noa(h) was way cute but super shy around me and my loud drummingness. Thus continues small children being frightened of me?

I’ve spent great nights all over the place the last few weeks: dinners in Dupont, concerts in Vienna, botanical garden picture safaris, and frustratingly rewarding adventures abound.

So dare I ask, how are you?